My New Week In Pictures. By Uncle Monty.

My New Week In Pictures.

Story By Uncle Monty.

Photos By Alex Albion.

...

Going to get my weekly stock of the latest edition of

The Big Issue at London’s Covent Garden, I quickly

noticed has I passed Fred Perry’s store the window

display of wooden figures (shown below) that I in-

stantly photographed for the start of my new week.

...
It was the 13th day of the month, which wasn’t lucky

for me as I then saw Big Issue staffer Tom Woolock

arrive with his usual sullen face and curt manner. I

think he was also late at the distribution spot that is

located, as usual, right outside next to Boots at St.

James Street. With his usual sneering and contemp-

tuous attitude, Tom hardly acknowledged me or any

of the other vendors with his typical surly demeanour.

...
Never expect a “good morning” or “thank you” or a
“please” from him because you won’t get such from

Tom, who is partnered with Sam. She's been with

The Big Issue for well over 10 years now after she

herself was homeless on the streets of London.

She also rough-sleeped with the late Dame Anita

Roddick, who wanted to experience first hand

the sights and sounds of homelessness herself

for at least a couple of nights. That she

did with hard-nosed Sam at her side.

...
Last time I saw Tom was about 10 days before

the 13th, has he then walked right by my Big Issue

pitch and uttered no a kind word of greetings or

anything. How cold? Instead, he just glared hard at

me and so mean at me as if I had done something

wrong has he continued to walk right by with his

6 or 7 year old son and 3 or 4 others with him only

feet away from me and my Long Acre pitch.

...

One of his buddies had a camera in his right hand.
After he'd passed me, Tom then made some re-

marks about me to his street companions and they

all turned around to look at me as they continued to

walk on towards Great Queen Street. Yes, I know
Tom and me don’t care much at all about one an-

other. When I give him my 35 quid for my maga-

zine stock, I can bet a $1.000 he’ll not trust me

like others do. He always insists on counting out

my money as if I’m going to cheat. Sam is also

the same. They trust none of the vendors even

though they are themselves Big Issue vendors,

too. The Big Issue, of course, wouldn’t give a

vendor a dime anyway. Nor would they ...

...
One redeeming grace that I particularly like

about Sam is her short pieces she ably writes in

The Big Issue from time to time. That's if she is

the same Sam I read under the name of "Sam"

at the magazine's Street Lights. Her piece on

"drawing the curtains at night," for instance,

was truly superb. I loved every word she

wrote and I was impressed at her writing

style and her savvy composition. I only

wish she and Tom were like others who are

so kind and nice to me because, among

other things, of my own unbending writings

on just about everything ... At The Big Issue

distribution spot, I might as well be dead for

all they care about me or anybody else who

may be a vendor or a victim of homelessness.

It's so sad, but so true from what I have seen.

So my starting day of Monday then had mixed

encounters of the good, the bad, and the in-

different for sure.

...

Fred Perry's Covent Garden store window display.

...

Then on Tuesday one of my truly favourite people

arrived called Bronwyn Curry of The Royal Ballet.

We only get to see each other for about five weeks

each year since Bronwyn literally travels the world

as a rare choreologist that she is to the world's ballet

companies from far and wide. She's just been at the

Salt Lake City's Utah Ballet doing her expert chore-

ology there and will no doubt soon be off to some-

where else in the world of classical ballet.

...

Don't confuse Bronwyn Curry (shown below) with

those folkz like the late noted choreographers Sir

Frederick Ashton and Gene Tetley, who Bronwyn

knew so well. Choreology and choregraphy are two

different aspects of ballet to those who know all

about the art and design of professional dance.

...

She herself was a ballet dancer of note in the

1970's and she now lives in Italy with paint artist

Franco Bennetti and with each other when they're

travelling around the world together. I am hoping

perhaps to stay with Bronwyn and Franco next year

when I plan to attend the 7th World Homeless Cup

at Italy's Milano in 2oo9 and after I travel in Novem-

ber of this year to Melbourne, Australia, to attend the

2oo8 Sixth World Homeless Cup that has been fully

underwritten by Contessa Maria for me to go to the

far side of the world. In the meantime, I am enjoy-

ing spending some time with Bronwyn and Franco

while they're still here in London for another three

weeks before they set sail to somewhere else. It is

really so nice to be treated so nicely by them as

opposed to when I'm "being served" so coldly

by Big Issue's Tom and Sam ...

...
World Choreologist Bronwyn Curry of The Royal Ballet.
...
On Wednesday another of my favourite people came

by that happens to be Pret's driver (shown below)

Nuno Sarmento of Mozambique's old Lourenco

Marques and that is now known by its relatively new

name of Maputo, the country's capital. I think Nuno,

who is Portuguese, Spanish and English speaking, sees

me as a kind of grandfatherly figure to him which is

just fine with me. Always warm and friendly to every-

body, Nuno is about 22 years old and undoubtedly

as plenty of nice girlfriends to occupy him. He loves to

joke and make wisecracks with me to share and throw

at each other both happily and avidly whenever we're

at my pitch. He's been at Pret's for around a couple of

years I guess. He regularly visits my pitch almost

daily and never fails to offer me Pret sandwiches

and fizzy drinkz. That's so good of him.

Thankz again, Nuno ...
....
Pret's electric van driver Nuno Sarmento at the wheel

...

Come then Thursday, I "visited" the mechanical

nurse (pictured below) at Guys Hospital after

undergoing my first "CatScanDoo," as I called it,

or more correctly my MRI scan to see what the

the heart doctors could detect that's wrong with

my old and weary heart. Not heard yet what the

results have been of the extraordinary scan, but

my great heart consultant Dr. Gerry Carr-White

seemed pleased that my heart condition hasn't

gotten any worse of late. Where there's life,

there's hope. Right?

...
The Mechanical Nurse at Guy's Hospital.
...

My "Girl Friday" is sexy Sophie McElligott,

(shown below) who seems to pop-up at my

pitch mostly on Fridays ... She always stops to

say "Hi" and from time to time she also buys

The Big Issue from me. She is with the London

Fashion Showrooms is Sophie. She always has

a broad smile on her pretty face and a lovely

kiss for me without failure. Bravo. When I

sent her a nice postcard from Casablanca last

time, she was thrilled. I, too, was thrilled that

she was thrilled after sending the card

to her from the wilds of Morocco.
...

She's so cute is Sophie and is my

own "Girl Friday," I like to think ...

...
Sophie McElligott of London Fashion Showrooms.
...
Saturday was filled with people I didn't person-

ally know among all the idiots lined up at The
New Connaught Rooms for open auditions for
the tacky "Britain's Got Talent" competition.

Except for my buddy Aussie Ryan Tucker with

pups Lulu and Poppy (shown below), I didn't like

much of what I saw of the long and loud queues of

"wanna-be" celebrities lined up like cattle on London's

Great Queen Street all day long on Saturday and also

earlier in the week with street security guards con-

trolling the growing and stupid crowds of people.
...
Freemasons Arms' Aussie Ryan Tucker and pups.

...
Here you'll see below one of the would-be "wanna be"

groups like the Latino dance group all competing

to be seen and heard above the other "artistic" folkz.

...

Streams of Afro-Masons came out of the Masonic Head-

quarters as they walked down the street in unison with

my cameras taking a few snapshots of them while they

then sidestepped the audition crowds blocking their

public passage. I saw dozens and dozens of black

masons that I never knew before existed in such

large numbers at the Masonic Lodge.

...
Some of London's Afro-Masons.

...
For Sunday, I was able to get away from London's
maddening crowds with dear Elizabeth Middleton
as we went to Chipping Onger for the day. So from
the start of my new week -- Monday 13th to
Sunday 19th of October, 2oo8 -- I had
encountered all manner of man and woman
with perhaps taking more than 60 various
photos to record my full week for you at
my ever-growing blog readership.
...
Quietly, England's Chipping Onger.
...
:: SIDEBAR ::

No big issue and no big fus(s). I’ve used abit of
distortion here below to make a point that I will

leave you with for all to figure out one way or an-

other. I didn’t add “FUS” to the car plate, but I did

add “NO BIG ISSUE” to the café sign for fun and the

two crosses of light blue and bright orange … Have

you now figured out the point of the photograph?

If you haven't then simply email me for an explan-

ation at thebiggerissue@k.st. There's no charge ...

...
Have yourself a good and kind day, Uncle Monty.
+Hills of the North Rejoice, 2oo8.
...